Low and Away
by rckyfrk
Summary: Minutes before the game, a uniformed man comes with bad news for one of the Rockford Peaches. Instead of the telegram going to Betty, it's Dottie who finds out her husband has been killed in action. Jimmy goes to comfort his star player.


**Low and Away**

The team was gearing up for their game when Jimmy burst through the locker room door. "All right, everyone, let's listen up now, listen up. Hey!" He broke his train of thought, diverting his attention to that bratty kid, Stillwell, who was currently tying himself up with tape. He faced his team again, "Something important has just happened. I was in the toilet reading my contract, and it turns out, I get a bonus when we get to the World Series. So, let's play hard, let's play smart, use your heads."

"That's that lump three feet above our ass, right Jimmy?" Doris yelled out, her cackle met by a round of laughter from the rest of the team.

"Well, some more prominent than others, Doris," Jimmy joked with his 3rd base player. A knock came from the door behind him. "Come in!"

Jimmy turned to see a uniformed man holding a clipboard. "Excuse me! Excuse me! I have a telegram for one of you ladies from the War Department." All the levity in the locker room from a moment ago vanished as an eerie and reverent hush fell over the group. Several of the women sat on the benches lining the locker room. "Let's see here. Boy, I hate these, these are the worst!" he complained, searching through the papers on his clipboard. "The least the Army could do is send someone personally, to tell you your husband is dead. Darn, I had the name right here!" The Western Union delivery man slapped the envelope against the clipboard and announced, rather nonchalantly, "Well I gotta go back and get this straightened out," and turned to leave.

Jimmy grabbed for the man's shoulder, "Wait, just give me the telegram."

The delivery man rolled his eyes, "I can't. I don't have a name on the checklist," not seeming to care that one of these women had just lost her husband.

"Just give me the telegram," Jimmy insisted, trying to control his temper in front of his team of distraught women. Finally losing his patience, he snatched the envelope from the man's hand and turned him, shoving him out of the room then slamming the door in his face.

The delivery man fought him the whole time, protesting, "Hey, this is official. This is from the War Department! C'mon, that's official business! I'm coming back!" he yelled at the closed door before straightening his jacket and storming off down the hallway.

Jimmy ignored the man's tantrum, focusing on opening the telegram, dreading being the one to deliver the awful news to one of his girls. He'd taken this managing job reluctantly, really only doing it to keep his foot in the door, hoping to coach a real team one day. Over the last few months, these women had worked their way under his skin, and he grew to care for each one of them.

He walked slowly between the benches, feeling every set of eyes watching him, all of them praying that they would be spared this horrible grief. His heart dropped into his stomach as he read the name of the deceased. He stopped in front of Dottie and Betty Spaghetti and had to swallow back the lump in his throat before he could speak.

"I'm sorry, Dottie," he mumbled and held the telegram out to his best player.

He felt like the world's biggest piece of crap as this woman he'd come to know as more than just a player, but as a friend, broke down into hysterical tears. "NO! God, Bob, no!" Jimmy stood in near shock as his team piled around their catcher, offering their support and condolences.

Jimmy felt his heart breaking for Dottie, who was clutching the telegram over her heart and sobbing uncontrollably. Not able to just watch anymore, he pushed the other girls out of the way and coaxed Dottie off the bench and into his arms. He'd never had a woman hold him so tightly, her grip around his shoulders desperate as she wept, almost screaming, onto his shoulder. He patted her back, not knowing what else to do to try to comfort her. He muttered trite phrases, trying to calm her down, to get her to breathe, but she wasn't hearing him.

Miss Cuthbert, the girls' chaperone, eventually came over and took Dottie from his arms, steering her out of the locker room and down the hall into the manager's lounge. He watched as the women slowly walked away. Not able to look at his team, he swallowed again, trying to find his voice. "Alright, come on. We've still got a game to play." He did his best to put on a brave face as he walked out of the locker room, trying his hardest to focus on the game ahead of them.

They lost the game. Of course they did. When news like that hit one player, it affected them all. No one's heart was in it, their thoughts all with their teammate. The dug out was almost silent throughout the game. The one consolation was that Kit, Dottie's sister, had pitched the day before, so she was able to stay in the manager's lounge with her instead of trying to focus on the game.

Jimmy found his way back to his apartment, his thoughts still with Dottie. Just the other night, they had had a long conversation on the bus about her husband, and it was clearly evident how much she loved him, how much she hated being seperated from him. He remembered thinking how very lucky he thought Bob was, feeling just this side of jealous of the man. He had bonded quickly with Dottie; she readily called him out when he deserved it, picked up any slack before he really embraced his managing job for the team. She was smart, had a good head on her shoulders, and was probably the best player in the league. Hell, she played better than some of his former teammates. Not to mention how gorgeous he thought she was.

He shook his head violently. "Knock it off, Dugan," he admonished himself. She didn't need that kind of crap now. She needed support, kindness, not some twice-divorced guy, her manager for crying out loud, thinking about her like that.

He dressed out of his uniform and into slacks and a button down shirt. At the last minute he decided to slip a tie around his neck. He wasn't sure what caused him to think of it, but thought it would show that he gave a damn. Jimmy drove himself over to the house the girls shared when they weren't out on the road for an away game. He knocked on the front door and was greeted by Miss Cuthbert.

"Mr. Dugan," she looked and sounded surprised to see him.

He nodded at her, "Good evening, Miss Cuthbert. How's she doing?"

Miss Cuthbert already knew who he was talking about. "She hasn't come out of her room since we got here. The poor thing, she's just been in there, sobbing and wailing all day."

"Do you mind if I go see her?" he asked sheepishly.

"Come right in," she said with a sad smile, opening the door wider and pointing up the stairs. "Turn right at the top of the stairs. Hers is the last room on the left."

Jimmy nodded again and slowly climbed the stairs, his knee bothering him on each step. He heard the quiet conversations of the rest of his team drifting from the kitchen and dining room; the girls were probably in the middle of dinner. He finally reached the top of the steps and located Dottie's room, finding the door closed. He knocked softly but only heard whimpering coming from the other side. He turned the knob and palmed the door open.

Dottie was lying on the bed, her back to the door facing the curtain covered window. Jimmy cleared his throat to alert her of his presence. He saw her jump slightly at the sound and peer over her shoulder. She sat up slowly, wiping tears from her face. "Oh...Jimmy...I..."

He entered her room, closing the door behind him, and took in the sight of her. She was in a soft looking blue nightgown, now slightly rumpled. Her eyes were red-rimmed, matching her nose, while her usually rosy cheeks were pale. Her curls had been flattened down while she was lying on her pillow. Still, Jimmy thought she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. He shook his head, clearing his thoughts, and stepped gingerly into the room. "Hi, Dottie. I just wanted to stop by and offer my condolences. I'm so, so sorry."

"Thank you, Jimmy," she said softly, her voice wavering while fresh tears started to well up in her eyes. "I just...I don't know what to do." Her shoulders slumped over until her elbows met her knees and she cried again into her hands.

"Hey..." he tried consoling her, sitting on the bed next to her and pulling her to lean onto his shoulder. He cradled the back of her head and ran his other hand soothingly up and down her back. "It's okay, Dottie. Just let it all out." Jimmy was truly out of his element here, but figured he needed to say something.

"It hurts so much. I thought I missed him before, but this...and there's so much I don't know. Where was he? Was he alone? Did he suffer? I...I just can't handle this," she sobbed, her tears staining the front of his shirt.

Jimmy found he couldn't care less. He wanted to take all of this away from her, the pain, the sadness, the anger. All he could do was continue rocking her, slowly, rubbing her back in gentle circles. He combed his fingers through her hair. His first ex-wife loved when he'd done that for her, said it always relaxed her, so he figured he'd give it a shot.

His tactic worked; Dottie's sobs slowed to whimpers, then just sniffles, until she was just resting against him, letting him comfort her. After a long several moments, he sat her upright, turning her to look at him. Tears were still falling silently down her cheeks. He brushed them away with the pads of his thumbs and cupped her face. "Dottie, I don't know how, but it's gonna be okay. You've got your sister and your folks at home, you've got the girls, you've got...me." He swallowed before continuing, "You aren't alone. I know it feels like it now, but you've got so many people who love you."

Dottie shook her head, "I know," she sniffed, "I just...I feel so...so sad, and angry and empty and lost. My heart just hurts so much." She began to cry again.

Jimmy's heart broke for her. "I know, sweetheart. I know," he hugged her to him again. "It'll take a while, but you'll be okay. I know you will." He sat her up to look at her again, meeting her sad, watery eyes. "You are so much stronger than you think you are." He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "You're going to make it, I swear, Dottie." He rested his forehead against hers.

Dottie gave a small nod and sighed heavily, trying to breathe slowly in an attempt to keep the tears from starting up again. "Thank you, Jimmy." She kissed him on the cheek.

Jimmy sat back a little, surprised at her reaction, gauging the look on her face. She leaned forward again and pressed her lips to his. It took a full two seconds for Jimmy to react, placing his hands on her shoulders and gently pushing her back. "Dottie..." he began.

"Jimmy, I feel so empty inside. I don't want to feel like this. I want to feel something other than the pain. Please, Jimmy," she whispered and turned a pair of watery eyes up to him.

His mind was reeling. What exactly was she asking for? Did it really matter? The tone of her voice and the pleading look on her face was too much for him to even try to resist. He found he wanted to do anything to make her feel better, to be there for her in any way she needed him. He swallowed heavily, already sending half a prayer up to ask for forgiveness; he cupped his hand under her jaw and brought her soft lips to meet his. He could do this for her. He wouldn't make any moves, letting her have control every step of the way. She needed this, he knew she did, needed some kind of control in her life.

Her soft lips moved against his, and he met her movements easily. He felt her tongue tentatively glide along his lower lip once, twice. On the third time he opened to her, letting her in, tasting her. She moaned as she kissed him harder, wrapping her slim but toned arms around his neck. She pressed herself against his chest; his hands naturally slid around her to rest along her waist. Dottie tilted her head, trying different angles of their kiss, holding him all the more tighter. She pulled her mouth away from his and rested her forehead against his.

"Please, Jimmy," she whispered. "Kiss me."

His eyes searched her face; there was a quiet determination beyond all the sadness. He moved his hands up her back and pulled her into him, kissing her deeply, taking the control she had lent to him. The sweetness of her mouth mixed with the saltiness of her tears made him pause, only for a fraction of a second, before kissing her in earnest. He threaded his fingers through her soft auburn hair and explored her mouth with his tongue. Her kisses were perfect, matching each of his movements without hesitation. He groaned against her as her tongue twirled around his. He closed the kiss, pulling her bottom lip between his, sucking gently before releasing her.

They were both left breathless, still holding each other tightly. Dottie lowered her head to rest on Jimmy's shoulder; his arms drifted to encircle her, cradling her against him. He rested his cheek on top of her hair, breathing her in.

"Jimmy?" Dottie whispered. He lifted his head to look down at her. She peeked up at him, the sadness still echoing on her face. "I need you to touch me."

"Dottie..." Jimmy began, but couldn't bring himself to argue or dismiss her, not when she was looking at him like she was now.

"Please. Bob's been gone for so long. I've been so lonely without him, and now I'll never feel him touch me again." Fresh tears welled up in her eyes, her lower lip trembled. She took a deep breath and whispered, "Can I...can I just pretend? Just for tonight?"

Jimmy gaped at her. Of course she didn't want him – she wanted her husband – but she needed him, for now, for this. Tonight wasn't about him; it was about taking care of her, his friend, probably the only female friend he'd ever really had. He cared for her, maybe even loved her, and she was asking him to do this for her.

Jimmy sighed inwardly and bent his head to kiss her. "Close your eyes," he breathed against her lips, just a second before he sealed his mouth over hers. He ran the back of his fingers along her cheek before turning them to cup her jaw. His thumb grazed over the apple of her cheek. He pulled his mouth away from hers and guided her head ever so gently to tilt to the side, giving him access to the long column of her throat.

He couldn't remember a woman tasting so good, smelling so sweet, sounding so soft and reckless at the same time. He left a trail of open mouth kisses along her neck, trailing to that delicate space behind her ear, down to her soft shoulder and collarbone.

He looked up at her and found her eyes still closed, her head thrown back, her beautiful auburn hair cascading over her shoulders and down her back. Her lips were parted, panting softly. He whispered, "You're so beautiful," before claiming her mouth again.

Jimmy couldn't hold back any more. If she was pretending that he was Bob, then he'd pretend she was his. He remembered her asking him to touch her and decided to throw caution to the wind and give her what she asked for.

He kissed her, softly but still passionately, relieved that she was giving and taking along with him. He brought his hand to gently cup her breast through the fabric of her night gown, eliciting a soft gasp from her at the contact. He waited for her silent assent for him to continue; her arms slowly wound around his neck, her back curving, arching slightly toward him, pushing her breast further into his palm, filling his hand. He kneaded her tenderly, loving how she felt against him; his kiss deepened as he started squeezing with just a little more pressure.

Dottie sat back, leaning away from him; Jimmy figured he had crossed the line, that she couldn't take pretending anymore, until he realized her eyes were still closed. He took in the expression on her face, as if she were at war with herself, her body's needs fighting strongly against her conscience. When she reached for the hem of her nightgown and pulled it over her head, Jimmy knew which side had won out. He sat stock still, not wanting to push her, wanting her to be ready to continue before moving on.

After a long moment, she blindly reached in front of her, her hand finding his shoulder. Her hand ran along his arm, then took his hand in both of hers and brought it to touch her bare breast. She found his other shoulder as he resumed his tender kneading and brought his other hand up so she was filling both of his palms.

Jimmy grazed his thumbs over and around her nipples, teasing them into tight peaks. His eyes roamed over her creamy skin, glowing in the soft lamplight. He wanted to taste her, all of her. He brought his lips back to her neck and kissed her there, licked her sweet skin, bringing goosebumps to the surface with the edges of his teeth. His ears absorbed the sound of her gasp, her breathy moan, as he trailed further down, his tongue dancing around the pulse point at the base of her neck. He let his lips travel slowly, inching his way down her chest. Her hands gripped his biceps tightly, but never pushed him away; he took her response as permission to continue. Jimmy dragged the tip of his tongue along the crest of her breast and feathered kisses along her skin until his lips found her already swollen nipple. He closed his mouth around it, sucking ever so gently on it; she rewarded him with another soft moan and by running her fingernails along his scalp, grabbing his hair and pulling him further into her. He increased the pressure while slowly pulling away from her, elongating her nipple before finally releasing it and moving to repeat the process on the other side.

He dragged himself away from her chest, kissing her already swollen lips again, easing her onto the bed, her hair fanning out behind her on the pillows. Jimmy noticed a slight frown on her perfect lips, her brow puckered, and he knew she was fighting with herself again. He laid on top of her, still fully clothed, letting his weight sink into her. He leaned down close to her ear and murmured, "We don't have to do this if you don't want to." He wasn't about to go one step further if she wasn't ready.

Dottie shook her head adamantly, "No. I need this...I want this."

With that, her hands came up, fingers trembling as she untied his tie and unbuttoned his shirt. As much as he wanted to take over, move things along faster, he let her set the pace in undressing him, figuring this would give her time to either change her mind or convince herself this was truly what she wanted. She reached the last button; his shirt hung loosely around him, the edges of the flaps ghosting over her skin. Her hands moved on to his belt buckle, fumbling with it at first before finally loosening and releasing it. He knelt back and undid the button and zipper of his pants then returned to his position above her, this time keeping his weight supported on his elbows, keeping more space between them.

Her cool fingertips brushed up and down his torso, feeling what her eyes couldn't see; she ran them through the curling hair that crossed his chest, over his abdomen, which had once been taught with muscle, but now was less so. Finally her fingertips lighted on the waistband of his boxers, pausing for a moment before curling underneath the elastic and pushing it down over his hips. He moved again, working himself out of his clothes quickly, and returned to her.

Jimmy nestled himself between her legs, letting his hardness rest against her thigh. The only things seperating them right now were her panties and a few inches of space between their bodies. He cupped his hand around her jaw and kissed her again then snaked his hand down her body, grazing over her nipple, her ribcage, her hip. He paused for a fraction of a second, then worked his fingers under the elastic of her underwear, then stopped again. "Is this okay?" he whispered against her lips. She nodded in response, biting her bottom lip as she did so. He kept his eyes locked on her face, looking for any sign of panic or fear or hesitance as he moved his hand lower, his fingers meeting the nest of curls just above her sex. He waited there, giving her a moment to become accustomed to the feeling, another chance to turn him away. He moved further, his middle finger just barely seperating her lower lips, finding her already wet for him.

His finger hovered just outside of her entrance, checking again if Dottie was still okay with this. "You're sure?" he asked. Her response was only to reach for him, running her fingers through his hair, pulling him down to kiss her. He followed her silent request and slowly slid his finger into her, momentarily thrown by how tight she felt around him. He moved his hand in delicate circles, pushing in and out, feeling her hips buck gently against him.

He leaned back, putting plenty of space between them, instanly missing the feel of her against him, and slid her panties over her hips; he took her pushing her hips off the bed to help remove the garment as a sign that she was still sure she wanted this. He settled into the cradle of her hips again, lining himself up at her center. "Ready?" he asked gently.

Dottie breathed heavily then nodded, "Please."

Jimmy lowered himself onto her, so his chest hair was grazing over her nipples. He pushed his hips forward, easing his way into her. She felt amazing, heavenly, perfectly fitted around him. He moved painfully slowly, until he felt her moving against him. He increased his tempo, pushing further into her; her legs wrapped beautifully around him, anchoring him to her. He adjusted himself, changing the angle so he was grinding around her sensitive little nub with every thrust, hopefully bringing her closer to release.

She stayed practically silent throughout; the only sounds he heard from here were soft sighs and moans and tiny little "oh"s. He hung his head low so his lips were at her ear, grazing along her neck, kissing her firmly, then whispered against her, "Oh, Dottie."

"Bob," she whispered, and Jimmy lost his rhythm, his thrusts faltering for a second, maybe two. He shook his head and reminded himself that they were both pretending, both losing themselves in one another. He knew this going in, and had no delusions of this meaning anything more to her than what it was, but it was still a blow to his ego to hear her call out another man's name in his ear. He clenched his jaw and found his pacing again, putting her first, giving her what she needed.

He felt her legs tighten around him, her arms wrap desperately around his back, her nails digging into his skin. He continued to push into her, helping her find her release. Finally, she exploded silently around him, her inner walls gripping him tightly. He focused all his will power on stopping himself from finishing yet. He wouldn't dare empty himself in her. He couldn't, wouldn't, risk getting her pregnant. He cared far to much for her to do that to her, to put her through that, especially with no husband. No, he would stop himself and give himself blue balls before putting her through any of that.

Dottie rode out her climax, her grip on him, inside and out, beginning to lessen until she was completely relaxed against him. He pulled out of her and pumped himself with his hand, spraying streams of his semen over her lower belly. He found a box of tissues on her night stand and reached over, grabbing a couple, and cleaned her off before laying down next to her, cradling her in his arms. "You okay?"

She only nodded, her breathing eventually evening out, returning to normal. After several quiet minutes, she looked up at him from under her eyelids. "Jimmy?"

"Yeah."

"Thank you. I'm so sor..."

He cut her off. "Don't be sorry. I know. It's okay." It wasn't okay. Jimmy didn't think his heart would ever be the same, but he'd be okay for her; he'd be strong for her.

After long, quiet moments, Jimmy peeled himself away from her and got dressed. Dottie slipped her nightgown over her head. They were standing on opposite sides of the bed until Dottie came around the foot of the bed to stand in front of him. She wound her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. "Thank you, Jimmy. I know that wasn't easy for you."

Jimmy hugged her to him, briefly, kissing her temple then releasing her and stepping toward the door. "Look, take all the time you need. The team will be here when you're ready to come back...if you're ready to come back."

"Thanks. I don't know if I'm coming back, but it's good to know."

Jimmy nodded and looked at his shoes. "Well, uh...goodbye, Dottie."

"Goodbye, Jimmy."

He turned and left her room, walked quickly down the hallway and down the stairs, grateful the rest of the team was just now finishing up their meal. He hurried out the front door, down the pathway to the driveway, to his car, and drove off. He wanted only the best for Dottie, and knew that he wasn't it, not now at least. His thoughts and his heart stayed with her as he returned to his lonely apartment.


End file.
